Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas... I love that one

- The reason why terrorists attacked New York City was because JackBauer was in LA.

- You can lead a horse to water. Jack Bauer can make him drink.

- Jack Bauer let the dogs out.

- If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.

- If you wake up in the morning, it's because Jack Bauer spared your life.

- Colin Farrell smokes a pack of cigarettes a day. Jack Bauer smokes apack of terrorists anytime he feels like it.

- Deaf people listen to Jack bauer.

- Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.

- Jack Bauer killed 93 people in just 4 days time. Wait, that is a realfact.

- Jack Bauer has been to Mars. Thats why theres no life on Mars.

- Jack Bauer cannot stick his elbow in his ear, but he can stick your elbow in your ear.

- Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the nexthalf-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.

- 1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight.

- Osama bin Laden's recent proposal for truce is a direct result of himfinding out that Jack Bauer is, in fact, still alive.

- Jack Bauer was never addicted to heroin. Heroin was addicted to JackBauer.

- Jack Bauer's favorite color is severe terror alert red. His secondfavorite color is violet, but just because it sounds like violent.

- Jack Bauer doesn't miss. If he didn't hit you it's because he was shooting at another terrorist twelve miles away.

- Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas.

- If Jack and MacGyver were locked in a room together, Jack would make abomb out of MacGyver and get out.- Jack Bauer got Hellen Keller to talk.

- The quickest way to a man's heart is through Jack Bauer's gun.

- Jack Bauer once told God he needed access, the event has since beenreferred to as "The Big Bang."

- Lets get one thing straight, the only reason you are conscious right now is because Jack Bauer does not feel like carrying you.

- When you open a can of whoop-ass, Jack Bauer jumps out.

- When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists.Jack Bauer frigging hates lemonade.

- Did you know there was a national disaster last night while you weresleeping? Of course you didn't, Jack Bauer was on duty.

- When the boogie man goes to sleep, he checks his closet for JackBauer.

- Jack Bauer played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.

9 Comments:

Blogger Pragmatician said...

a fan or a disliker of Jack Bauer?
I hate his overly arrogant attitude as well.

8:17 AM  
Blogger swiftthinker said...

you might hate it. But he has to be as full of himself to push and dominate the way he does in his job.

9:04 AM  
Blogger Pragmatician said...

makes sense what you say, let's just notforget he is a fictional character.

3:44 AM  
Blogger GOVI said...

fictional? what's wrong with you? this is a true tribute to a great man!

12:56 PM  
Blogger GOVI said...

fictional? what's wrong with you? this is a true tribute to a great man!

1:00 PM  
Blogger swiftthinker said...

Jack Bauer is to CTU what GOVI is to CCTC.

2:13 PM  
Blogger swiftthinker said...

Jack Bauer is to CTU what GOVI is to CCTC.

2:13 PM  
Blogger GOVI said...

that's an amazing compliment - i am touched (not by the naked mexican from the shvitz)!

2:41 PM  
Blogger swiftthinker said...

Gov,

I thought we were gonna drop that topic for GO's sake.

2:48 PM  

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